#coaching #management #human-management #communication
Coaching is helping someone reach a conclusion themselves by asking questions rather than providing answers.
To be effective it requires the recipient to a) have the skills b) have the motivation.
Stay curious a little longer, rush to action and advice-giving a little more slowly.
~ Michael Bungay Stanier, The Coaching Habit
There are tons of opportunities in daily life to be coach-like. Make it a habit. Tame the advice monster.
Create the habit by telling yourself “When this happens” “instead of” “I will”
Be lazy, be often, be curious.
Use the 7 questions to structure coaching:
- What’s on you mind
- And what else
- What’s the real challenge here for you
- What do you want
- What am I going to say yes to, and if I say yes to that what must I say no to?
- How can I help a
- What was most useful for you?
Use the 3Ps to dig: Project, People, Pattern of behavior
Use the Bookend to be impactful: start quick (whats on your mind), finish strong (what was useful for you)
prepare for coaching - adjust behavior
_What was the situation?
What was the observed behavior?
From their point of view?
What is the gap?
What would have been a more desirable behavior?
What conclusion do I want to drive?
What questions can help the coachee need to realize issues with observed behavior?
What questions can help him figure what could have been better?
What mentoring do I want to give?
- How did it go?
- What do you think was the goal/the person needing?
- What was your response? How did you approach?
- Do you think it fulfilled the goal?
- What could you have done differently?
- Looking forward: what will you do? How will you make sure you do it?
- Do I give a piece of advice?
Coach in One to one meetings
Be empathetic (#5) during coaching.
Determine if coaching is the appropriate Leadership styles
Coaching habit is coach Michael's book and training.
Carnegie / How to win friends and influence people has several rules related to that:
- Show respect to other people’s opinion, don’t say “you’re wrong”
- Be a good listener, encourage people to talk about themselves.
- Let people realize things by themselves - walk the realization process and feel like ideas are theirs.
- Appeal to nobler motives
- Challenge people: appeal to the desire to excel
- Ask questions, drive the thinking of the other person towards what you think they should do… without telling them directly (so they think it’s their own idea).
- Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to