Anger

• comes from a fight response to a situation
• is triggered by fear
• can come from unfulfilled need
• is very often for protecting your ego from being armed: being exposed, shamed, pride, not respected, need of consistency ...
• perceived wrong being done
• incapacity to change how someone is behaving
• seeing traits we don't like about ourselves
• can originate from cognitive dissonance

Anger is bad

• detractor to happiness
• increased issues with health
• breaking social bonds

Anger can be dealt with

• diffuse and avoid anger generating situations
• generally be nicer and appreciative about people to avoid them being angry. Also initiate discussions in a way the outcome is predictable
• confront people further from their mistakes to avoid
• walk away from situations that are escalating to anger
• take a step back and try to understand what unfulfilled need, emotion,... Triggered the anger. What is the root cause
• apologize truly
• communicate genuinely, and be easy to approach
• keep an anger journal - what kind of trigger, what kind of response, what could have been done differently

Neuroplasticity

• recable your response to triggers. How you react to a situation is how you will react the next time. If that reaction is anger there's more chance you'll react with anger next time. And vice versa. Takes between 3 and 6 weeks of repeated behaviour to form habits.
• 4 progression stages for muscle memory: unconscious-unskilled, conscious-unskilled, conscious-skilled, unconscious-skilled. Imagine stick shift, as a kid you don't know it's even a thing. Then you learn about but don't know how to. Then you learn how to but need to think about it. Then it's muscle memory, and you can do it without thinking about it.
• anger training is the same, it generally starts at conscious unskilled (I know I have a problem), conscious skilled (you need to catch yourself and consciously change your reaction), then it becomes a habit and you react automatically
• relive anger situations and think of yourself as someone you'd like to have been
• playback situations you are proud of, and practice them as who you are (imagined practiced repetition is forming neural pathways)
• play imagined situations and how you would like to react to them
• be conscious when you're angry and take a step back, and summon your ideal reaction. Chemical reaction triggered by fear flushes out within 30s, you just have to resist that
• try to reverse the angry reaction and react with the opposite - love, humour,...
• meditate, practice breathing exercises and muscle relaxation to heighten the threshold of anger.
• breathe through. Breathing with long breathes is proven to reduce anxiety and lower HR.
• change how you perceive others, try to see the good in enemies, turn them into friends, reach out genuinely
• practice gratitude. Realize what is good in your life. Pay compliments to people, even for small things. It's generally harder to be angry at people you complimented, and for them to be angry at you
• play "how will I be angry today": what sort of triggers you might receive (disrespect? Fear? Shame?), replay such an instance, and imagine how you can react differently
• set yourself a goal. Put a time, and determine what of the five axises you want to work on: frequency, duration, trigger, response, intensity/expression

In any case anger should be dealt with. Even when it's justified, it's always still better to be driven by intellect than emotions, using emotion as an indicator and deciding of the response rather than being driven by it.